


A Vampire At The Prom Is Just No Fun

by Fletcher



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Future Fic, Humor, M/M, Prom, Romance, Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-03
Updated: 2013-07-03
Packaged: 2017-12-16 21:39:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/866895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fletcher/pseuds/Fletcher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stiles always had a thing for vampires. Until they became the reason Derek Hale is his prom date. Now he wants to stake them all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Vampire At The Prom Is Just No Fun

“I am not going to the prom with Derek Hale,” Stiles repeated yet again.

“But you have to,” Scott whined, “we have no other choice. It’s the only way that Derek can be there with all these new regulations.”

“I don’t care, Scott. This is prom, you’re supposed to go with someone you actually like. Not someone who you have learned to tolerate.”

“Are you forgetting that we’re dealing with a vampire here? We need Derek to be there and this is the only way,” Scott said.

“Can’t he be a chaperone or something?” Stiles suggested hopefully.

“No, he is officially banned from school grounds after he was caught lurking too much. Apparently Finstock isn’t a fan of 24 –year-olds hanging out on school grounds. _But_ they never specifically said he wasn’t allowed to be someone’s date to prom. And you’re the only available option since the rest of us already have a date now that Boyd mysteriously asked Danny this morning.”

“No need to rub it in. And it’s not too late for me to find a date, I’ve had my eye on Anna for a while now.”

Scott looked disbelievingly. “Hmm, the prom is tonight, when exactly were you going to ask her?”

“Today obviously. How dangerous is this vampire anyway? Are we even sure there really is a vampire?”

“According to Deaton and Derek, he’s very real and more importantly hungry. He only comes outside once every hundred years to eat and then he is going to back to sleep,” Scott explained again.

Stiles had heard enough. “And the prom is his perfect feasting place, I know. Lots of available walking meat. This is just not how I imagined my prom, it looks a lot more fun in the movies.”

“I know it sucks, but it’s not like you have to spend the entire night with Derek. You just have to stick with him for a while so Finstock can’t find an excuse to kick him out and then we have vampire business to take care of.”

“I guess it’s my turn to take one for the team,” Stiles finally agreed reluctantly. “I haven’t broken anything in a while. I hope you are bringing a ton of stakes.”

Scott looked super happy that he finally agreed. “Totally. But they are impossible to kill according to Deaton, we just have to keep him busy for a while until it’s time for him to go back to his cave. Then he officially becomes the problem of the people of Beacon Hills in the next century.”

“Well I hope future Scott comes up with better ideas to deal with him.”

“But you’ll do it right?”

Stiles let out a deep a sigh, “It’s not like I have a choice, but you owe me big time.”

*

“You’re going to the prom with Derek Hale?”

“I know dad, it sounds crazy but I have my reasons.”

John Stilinski looked extremely skeptical about these reasons. “I think you’d better tell me these reasons if you want to go this thing.”

Stiles started explaining, “Short story: there is a vampire…”

“Vampires are real,” his dad repeated, looking shocked.

“Yeah, I know right. Crazy stuff, but the good news is that there are very few of them and they hate people. They mostly live underground, literally. They don’t turn people or anything. But they get hungry once a century and the Beacon Hills vampire is waking up tonight. We think that he won’t be able to resist the prom.”

“Wouldn’t it be safer to just cancel the prom?” John suggested. “I’m sure I could come up with a bomb threat or something.”

“That wouldn’t work,” Stiles shrugged. “If we cancel the prom, people are just going to throw parties and then we have no idea where he will strike. At least now everyone is mostly partying in one place.”

“What does Derek think about this?”

Stiles couldn’t care less what Derek thought about this and that was exactly what he told his dad. “I don’t know, it’s not like we talked about it. Scott is the one who broke the news.”

“Ok, I’ll make sure that there are extra patrols tonight and promise me that you’ll call me when anything dangerous happens. The minute this is over, I want you home. No after-parties with Derek.”

Stiles had no idea what his dad was going on about.

“Why would I be going to after-parties with Derek? You’ve met Derek, does he strike you as the party type? But thanks for putting the image of a dancing Derek in my head, maybe I should try to get him on the dance floor. Thanks dad!”

“That is not what I was talking about,” John sighed. “I meant no sleepovers at Derek’s place.”

Still confused, Stiles asked, “Why would we want to sleep at Derek’s place? You can barely fit in four people in that place, let alone have a group sleepover.”

“For the love of God, use a condom!” John almost shouted in frustration.

“Dad, is this your subtle way of implying that I’m having sex tonight. With Derek Hale. You have met him right?”

“Yes, I have arrested him on several occasions. That’s exactly why I’m warning you.”

Stiles smirked, “I think you need a visual of this situation. First, remember Derek’s face when you’re interrogating him. Then look at the son standing in front of you. In what universe are we in the same league?”

“There’s no need to put yourself down, son. You look perfectly fine,” John assured him, patting him on the shoulder.

“Oh my god, I wasn’t!” Stiles yelled. “I was putting myself in the awesome league and Derek in the annoying jerk league. Did you just confess to finding Derek hot? I knew you had terrible taste when I caught you watching that Sarah Palin movie, but this is just offensive. Your own son tossed to the side,” he said dramatically.

“I think it’s time for you to get ready if you want to make it in time for the prom,” John sighed. There was a lot of sighing when you were raising Stiles Stilinski.

“Of course, I have to make sure that I look good enough to walk next to the hotness that is Derek Hale. Wouldn’t want to embarrass him,” Stiles said, feeling slightly pissed off, and he went to his room to put on his tuxedo.

Seriously, he was wearing a tuxedo, that is how much effort he was putting in this thing. He may have rented it with Scott since there was a promotion if you rented two,  but still he was wearing a _tuxedo_.

But instead of going with his secret crush like in every decent 80’s movie, he was going with Derek. Luckily, he didn’t have to worry about the whole losing your virginity at prom tradition. That ship had sailed over a year ago. In fact, it had sailed a lot more than his dad suspected. Lucy, Sarah and Ben had all been aboard.

Stiles had always been convinced that his dad didn’t have a clue, but maybe he did have his suspicions about Ben. He did catch him naked in Stiles’ room. Maybe he hadn’t believed that Ben needed to change his pants because of a sudden stain. Come to think of it, Stiles hadn’t really explained why he wasn’t wearing a shirt.

Ok, his dad probably knew about Ben, no biggie. He was tolerant, he liked Lady Gaga, he had even watched a couple of episodes of Glee. He clearly had an eye for male beauty considering his appreciation for Derek. Everything was going to be fine, no need for an emotional ‘I have a bisexual son’ moment.

More confusing was why his dad thought that Derek was into dudes. As far as Stiles knew, he didn’t even have sex. Well, there was the whole creepy Kate Argent thing, and that teacher he dated who turned out to be an evil witch. So clearly Derek wasn’t doing very well in the love department and had decided to convert to a life as a monk. A very hot monk.

What was Anna going to think when he arrived with a date? They had been sharing meaningful looks for days now. As usual, Stiles’ life sucked. He couldn’t wait for college.

They were usually vampire free, everyone knew vampires loved teenagers.

*

Stiles wasn’t one to toot his own horn, but he was looking pretty damn good in his tux. He was totally rocking the whole James Bond look.

His good mood was back, it didn’t really matter who he was going to the prom with. The most important thing was that his friends were there: Scott, Lydia, Allison and the others.

What future would there have been for him and Anna anyway? Theirs would have been a tragic love story, she was going to Princeton after all. It was for the best that he was going with someone he didn’t care about. It made saying goodbye a lot easier.

The doorbell rang, Stiles was shocked that Scott didn’t just jump through the window as usual. He had gotten used to using his werewolf powers a lot more now that Isaac was permanently attached to him. Not that Stiles was jealous of their super friendship, that was another ship that had sailed a long time ago. He had learned that it was unavoidable for the werewolves to stick together. That was why he started Team Human in the first place.

When he got downstairs, it wasn’t Scott who was waiting for him. It was hot monk Derek (better keep that nickname to himself). He looked really good in a tux, Stiles was sure his dad had enjoyed the view when he opened the door. Luckily, it seemed he had wisely retreated after the condom talk.

“I really hope your corsage fits with my tux. We do want our prom picture to look good enough for the mantel,” Stiles said sweetly.

“What corsage?” Derek asked, already looking grumpy. The night seemed even less promising.

“Um, it’s a prom tradition. For someone who spends all his free time with teenagers, you seem to know very little about them.”

“Stiles, we are going to this stupid thing to catch a vampire,” Derek said exasperated already. “I don’t care what lame fantasies you have, get over them.”

“Well excuse me for wanting to follow at least one of the prom traditions. I’m already breaking the most important one: not going with an asshole.”

“Yes, because you’re such a nice guy,” Derek smirked.

“I think people consider me a lot more pleasant than the guy who hangs out at the creepy house in the woods,” Stiles said. “I’m sure you’re already featured in a few ghost stories.“

“I’m so excited that I’m going to prom with the future prom king, it’s a dream come true,” Derek said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Now get to the limo, the others are waiting.”

“There is a limo?” Stiles said excited, no longer paying attention to Derek.

There was a limo and it was a pink one. That was a bit more flashy than Stiles would have imagined, but at least it was a real limo and not Derek’s lame family car.

It seemed Stiles’ house was the last stop since Team Human and Team Werewolf were all present.

“What’s up everyone? Everyone excited for prom?”

“Um, no,” Jackson answered irritated. “Did you already forget that we’re only going to this dreadful thing to chase after a vampire?”

“Jackson, drop the fake British accent. You were only there for a year, we know you’re not British,” Stiles pointed out.

“I kinda like it,” Lydia said, “it makes him sound like he’s in Downtown Abbey.”

“Now that Stiles has arrived and is hopefully shutting up,” Derek said, “we can go over our plan one last time. First, we go check in as a group. Once we’ve survived the security check and Finstock’s scrutiny, we split up to cover as much as ground as possible.”

Stiles interrupted him, “I suggest we do the opposite of what Derek says. If we listened to him, none of us would have made it to prom.”

“Would you shut up about your fucking prom already!” Derek yelled.

“Why don’t you go wallow in your apartment then, we can do this without you!” Stiles yelled back.

“No we can’t, Stiles,” Lydia said calmly. “We did the research, this vampire is powerful, it takes a whole pack of werewolves to control him if we don’t want to end up as blood bags.”

“Ok, I’ll shut up now,” Stiles conceded.

“Best news I’ve heard since I came back to this shithole,” Jackson murmured.

“Shut up, Jackson,” Lydia said. “We brought some stakes, but our main goal is to get him back where he belongs.”

“Are you sure we can’t kill him?” Allison asked. “Is there no loophole somewhere?”

“We’ve checked everything,” Lydia answered. “There is nothing in our source material. Vampire movies have clearly been lying to us. The stakes can hurt it a bit though so that should give us some more time.”

“How are we going to smuggle them past the security check?” Scott asked.

“It’s a metal detector, and if anyone tries to pat you down, tell them you’re a minor," Lydia told them. "Teachers are sensitive about that kind of thing. Obviously Derek isn’t getting one.”

“Looks like we’ve arrived,” Derek said. “Time to make all of Stiles’ dreams come true,” he mocked while Stiles threw him the filthiest glare he was capable of.

While everyone got out of the car, Stiles couldn’t help noticing how attractive his friends were. The prom look was clearly working for everyone.

The first ones up were Allison and Scott, followed by Jackson and Lydia, Isaac and Erica, Boyd and Danny and of course Derek and Stiles.

It suddenly occurred to Stiles that he could have gone to prom with Danny and Boyd with Derek. Why was this not happening? Did Danny veto him or something? Time to find out.

“Danny, it’s good to catch up.”

“Shouldn’t you be with your date, Stiles?” Danny rolled his eyes. That seemed to be his default look when he talked to Stiles.

“About that, want to trade?” Stiles asked, putting his natural charms to good use.

“What?”

“Oh, come on. I’ve seen you looking at Derek or should I say Miguel for old times’ sake,” he winked.

“I never know what you’re talking about,” Danny said.

“Oh come on, it’s simple. You go to the prom with Derek and I go with Boyd or even better, you go with me and Derek goes with Boyd. Let’s keep the humans and werewolves separated.”

Stiles was very excited about this plan.

“I can’t go with you, Boyd is my date,” Danny said resolutely.

“He’s not your real date, you’re only going with him because of this lame vampire thing.”

“Yes, and also because I don’t want to go with you. Or Derek.”

“Why don’t you want to go with Derek? Look at him, you could be looking at him all night.”

“Have you forgotten that he killed my boyfriend?” Danny reminded him spitefully.

“To be fair, he was evil and trying to kill Scott at the time. That kind of behavior should not be encouraged.”

Danny didn’t seem to agree. Stiles knew when he was fighting a losing battle and said, “Fine,  I’ll go have a talk with Boyd.”

He caught up with Boyd and started his sales pitch, “Boyd, I just wanted to ask..”

“Whatever you want, no. Always,” Boyd said without even looking with him.

Ok, no futures in sales for Stiles. “You could at least let me ask the question.”

“I just said no. Leave, Stiles, before I bite you.”

“You’re a beta, you can’t change me,” Stiles scoffed.

“No, but I can hurt you,” Boyd said meanly.

“Asshole. I’m surrounded by assholes, might as well stay with Derek.”

He stalked off back to where Derek was standing.

“Your little master plan didn’t work out?” Derek smiled evilly. Stiles was surrounded by evil.

“No,” Stiles replied, his good mood completely evaporated. “Because apparently everyone hates you which is not very surprising with your tendency to kill people.”

“Is Danny still going on about that Ethan?” Derek complained.

“You clearly have no idea how important getting laid is to the average teen boy. But then again, you never were the average teen boy. Tell me, is this your first prom?”

Derek’s face had storm clouds written all over it. “No, and drop it.”

“I thought so, you finished high school in New York right? I don’t know why you ever came back, I mean it’s New York.”

“Trust me, neither do I. I guess it was my destiny to meet you.”

“Aww, that’s the sweetest thing you ever said to me,” Stiles said, adopting a sugary sweet tone.

“And kill you.”

“The moment is ruined, time for our security check. Oh, and I was joking about the corsage, moron.”

Once they finally got inside, Stiles noticed that the prom committee wasn’t completely incompetent. They did the best they could with the gym. The theme was ocean so everything was blue. No future designers here.

The bad news was that he was officially stuck with Derek for at least two hours, that’s when their vampire would probably wake up. Stiles never had a problem with holding up a conversation, but even he needed a decent partner in crime.

“So what are your interests, besides turning people into werewolves?” Stiles asked innocently.

“Shut up, Stiles.”

“I can’t shut up for two hours, that’s not how Stiles Stilinski is wired,” he informed him.

“Then get rewired because I don’t want to listen to your ramblings.”

“Answer the damn question then.”

“Killing you is currently top of the list.”

“Promises, promises,” Stiles winked. “We both know you’re not going to do that, you love me too much. Besides what would be the point, I’m leaving Beacon Hills in no time.”

“Where are you going to college anyway?”

This was currently Stiles’ favorite topic. “I’m glad you’re showing some interest, I got into Georgetown.”

“That’s a long way from Beacon Hills,” Derek said carefully.

“I know, it’s awesome. Not that I’m not going to miss my dad of course, but still awesome.”

“Are you sure you want to go that far?”

“Why, are you going to miss me too much sour wolf?” Stiles teased. He _knew_ Derek liked him deep down. He even got him a drink when they got in.

“Of course not, I’m thinking about Scott.”

“Aren’t you always,” Stiles mumbled.

“You do realize that I have super hearing, I can hear you mumble. And what is that supposed to mean?”

“Just that you’re always so concerned about saving Scott or one of your pet werewolves, but if it’s me or Lydia in danger…”

“I helped you and Lydia with that whole zombie business,” Derek reminded him.

“Please, all you did was deliver the final punch. We did all the hard work ourselves,” Stiles said gleefully. Team Human had been amazing that day.

“That’s my point, you don’t need my help, you can take care of yourselves. My ‘pet werewolves’ on the other hand, they need their alpha.”

“Yes, how would they ever survive without their competent alpha by their side,” Stiles scoffed. “I’m sure you’ll make another brilliant contribution tonight.”

“Ok, what is your issue?” Derek asked curiously. “Do you really care this much about prom?”

“Yes I do, it might have escaped your notice that none of us exactly had a typical high school experience. This is not how it was supposed to go, I was supposed to be here with the person I loved or at least liked and my best friend. But Anna didn’t even look at me when I came in with you and Scott couldn’t care less if I’m here.”

Derek almost looked sympathetic. “Plans change, my high school experience wasn’t exactly what I dreamed about either.”

“Of course no one can win against your tragic past. But you’re not the only one in pain, you know,” Stiles said.

“I do know, I just don’t think you know what pain really is.”

Stiles wanted to inflict some pain on his face. “Excuse me, I don’t know what pain is. Fuck you, Derek! Go fight that fucking vampire by yourself, I’m going home.”

Derek grabbed his arm and said quietly, “You can’t go home now, it’s dangerous. There’s a bloodthirsty freak running around.”

“There are always freaks around, it’s Beacon Hills. My dad is patrolling, I’ll call him and stay with him tonight.”

“We might need you tonight,” Derek tried to convince him, “and Finstock..”

“Finstock is drinking from the punch which Greenberg just spiked and has very low tolerance. Go find Scott, I’m sure he’ll be a lot more helpful than me,” Stiles said and he finally stormed off.

He went to the cafeteria, figuring he could text his dad and stay with him for the rest of the night. He wasn’t dumb enough to go wandering outside with a crazy vampire on the loose.

Of course, since his life had always been more a tragedy than a comedy movie, he wasn’t alone in the cafeteria. He was joined by what appeared to be the vilest creature he had ever seen. Another thing the movies were wrong about, vampires were not hot in the slightest. Too bad.

“Um, hello, vampire. I’m Stiles, human,” he said carefully.

Always good to establish contact with your potential killer.

“Hello Stiles, I’m Joe, vampire,” the vampire answered in a surprisingly normal sounding voice. Stiles had expected some grunts or at least some Latin. And Joe wasn’t exactly the most intimidating name either.

“Um, nice to meet you, Joe,” Stiles managed to say. “Welcome to prom, I don’t know if you’ve ever been to one of these things before.”

“It’s a school dance, I remember.”

“Trust me, there is not a lot of dancing going on in there. In fact, not a lot of fun to be had at all. Why don’t we go outside, it must be much nicer for you to breathe some fresh air. If you breathe of course.”

“You seem to know a lot about me, Stiles. I like to read books too, in fact I’ve been reading a lot of them lately,” Joe said.

Stiles had always assumed that vampires spent most of their time lurking and asked, “How does that work exactly?”

“Oh, we have our ways and there is Amazon of course,” Joe explained with was probably supposed to be a smile on his deformed face.

“Of course, do you have like a computer or something? Or maybe not, it’s not easy having an internet connection in a cave.”

“I don’t exactly live in a cave,” Joe informed him, again with the creepy smile.

“Then where do you live?” Stiles asked, his curiosity piqued.

“In the basement.”

“What? The school basement? That’s not possible, we’d know,” Stiles protested.

“There are many things humans know nothing about, I don’t think your research will help you much in that aspect.”

“But our research,” Stiles stammered. “We found a book written about the last time you woke up, there was this eye-witness account...”

“And who do you think wrote that?” Joe asked brightly.

Stiles suddenly got chills, until now Joe had seemed like one of the more reasonable supernatural creatures he had encountered.

“So everything in that book is a lie,” he concluded.

“Not a lie exactly, I might have embellished a little but that is how history works. People were a bit occupied to do much fact-checking back then.”

“They did, I can’t believe I didn’t think of that,” Stiles said.

“Don’t blame yourself, you’re only human. For now anyway.”

He was officially starting to get the creeps. “For now?”

“It gets lonely in the basement, Stiles. One thing that was true about that book, I am the only vampire in Beacon Hills and there aren’t a lot of us out there in general. That’s why I was thinking about turning someone and you seem like a perfect candidate. Young, smart, pretty.”

Great, finally someone complimented his looks and it was the ugliest thing ever.

“I’m flattered but I’ll have to decline, I got into Georgetown.”

“No, you’re going to the basement,” Joe said, his temper rising quickly.

“Please don’t do this, I’m too young to die,” he begged, basements really creeped him out.

“Don’t worry, you’ll still look young and pretty. I only started looking like this after 500 years. Come now, don’t run. You’ll only make it worse for your friends.”

Stiles was planning on grabbing the stake Lydia had provided him with, but all of the sudden Derek was standing next to him. Thank God for that super speed.

“Stiles is not going anywhere with you, creep,” Derek growled. Stiles had missed the growling.

“Is it the age difference? You seem to be a bit older than him, werewolf,” Joe accused him with great disdain.

“Six years compared to a thousand, I think I win.”

“And what a prize he is,” Joe said, looking appreciatively at Stiles.

Seriously, all those hot werewolves and only the ugly vampire was interested in him.

“He’s mine,” Derek said.

Um what, time for Stiles to check back into this conversation.

“No one owns me,” he said irritated. “But I do prefer Derek,” he added. “Sorry, Joe.”

“I’m sorry too, because now you will have to leave your dead boyfriend. I know how attached humans can be to each other, I watched Twilight.”

“Well I am not your Bella, I am choosing the werewolf. Deal with it.”

For the first time, Joe showed his fangs. His very scary-looking fangs, not good. Fuck.

“Ok, no need to do anything rash,” Stiles hastily said. “Seriously, I’m not worth all this. I’m sure there are tons of people dying to live in your basement, literally. Ashley is a goth, she loves vampires.”

“I don’t like girls,” Joe announced.

“A gay vampire, how convenient. But I’m not gay, except for Derek of course. We’re very gay for each other.”

“Very,” Derek confirmed. Which was nice of him.

“I don’t care about your stupid werewolf, you’re coming with me,” Joe said and now the fangs were getting closer.

“Stiles, hide!” Derek yelled and did the classic werewolf jump which used to be impressive but wasn’t really that useful in any way.

Stiles didn’t want to leave him but finding help was really vital right now. He started running and pulled out his phone to call Scott. Luckily, he immediately picked up.

“Scott, come to the cafeteria, the vampire nearly attacked me, Derek is fighting him right now. I don’t think it’s going to end well, turns out our research was bullshit.”

“We’re coming,” Scott said and hung up.

That was very efficient of him.

Stiles finally took out his stake and ran back to where he left Derek. He couldn’t let his prom date be killed.

*

When he got back to where he came from, there was no trace of Derek. There was a lot of blood on the floor however. That didn’t mean anything, werewolves had their super healing powers. He was probably fine, but where was he?

When he turned around, he got his answer. Joe was currently drinking from him. Ewww. That looked a lot more fun when Eric did it in True Blood.

“Your boyfriend tastes good, I haven’t tasted a werewolf in decades. It’s very handy how he keeps healing as well. I do wonder if his blood supply isn’t going to run out prematurely, how fast does he heal?”

“Don’t do this. There is a whole pack of werewolves coming here, you can’t beat them all.”

“I believe I can and would you please drop the stake? It’s a bit cliché for my tastes.”

Stiles didn’t want to panic, but Derek was starting to look a bit pale.“I don’t believe you can take on a whole pack of werewolves or otherwise you wouldn’t be hiding in the basement. You’re not invincible.”

“Cleverly observed, but it’s only an observation. You don’t have the necessary facts, humans seem to like to have the facts.”

“I might not have all the facts and this stake is probably not going to do anything but there is a reason I got into Georgetown. Vampires don’t like sunlight, especially ones that live in a basement.”

Joe smiled sympathetically (well that was probably his intention), “I don’t want to discourage you, but you do realize it’s night.”

“I’ll give you that one,” Stiles said, “but I am a sheriff’s son, I can turn anything into a weapon. After all, there is very little that an axe won’t kill.”

Thank God for fire safety.

“You take that axe and I’ll drain your boyfriend,” Joe threatened, his fangs showing.

“Unlike you, he doesn’t die that easy. Scared?”

“Give it your best shot,” Joe dared him.

“I play lacrosse,” Stiles warned him. “I have good aim.”

It still took him three tries before he managed to chop Joe’s head off. But once it was off, Joe’s head rolled away with a very surprised expression on it.

“That was super gross, I’ll never be able to watch a vampire movie again. But it was worth it, I’m a freaking vampire slayer and you’re my werewolf in distress. Feel free to thank me any time,” Stiles said and that’s when Derek kissed him. On the lips, with a bit of tongue since he wasn’t exactly pushing him away.

“Um, thanks,” Stiles muttered.

“You’re welcome,” Derek said, sounding more insecure than he had ever heard him. “I mean, thank you for killing that vampire. I appreciate it.”

“I can tell.”

Scott and the rest of the gang seemed to have finally located the cafeteria and they all stormed in together, armed with stakes.

“The show is over, you guys. No more vampires left to defeat,” Stiles told them.

“But we got here as fast as we could,” Scott said, clearly disappointed. In fact, they all looked disappointed when they should be celebrating the fact that the creepy vampire was gone thanks to Stiles.

“I guess we should all go back to the gym and enjoy our prom,” Allison finally said. “Seems like you got your wish after all,” she smiled at Stiles.

“Yeah, guess I did,” Stiles said. “Scott, could we have a quick word?”

“Sure, I’ll be right behind you,” he told Allison.

“Scott, something major just happened.”

“Yeah, I know, I’m looking at him. Dead vampire, it’s very impressive.”

“Not that, Derek just kissed me!”

“Oh god, Stiles, you’re hallucinating.” Scott looked at him, his puppy eyes very concerned.

“I am not hallucinating!” Stiles shouted, his frustration growing by the second.

“Of course you are, why would Derek kiss you? That vampire probably bit you, he didn’t turn you, right?” Scott seemed to be studying his mouth, waiting for the fangs to pop out.

“He never even touched me, Derek’s the one who got bitten.”

“Ah, so Derek is the delusional one,” Scott concluded.

“I still don’t understand why someone has to be delusional to kiss me, am I really that hideous?” Stiles asked him.

“Of course not, you look fine,” Scott assured him. “But it’s not like you and Derek are secretly crushing on each other or something, that would be ridiculous. So really this is the most logical explanation.” Scott seemed very convinced of his point.

Stiles was insulted. No one believed in his hotness, not his dad and not his best friend.

“You know what, I’m going to look where my secret crush is so we can start banging before midnight. I’ll bring you the evidence.”

“I really don’t need any evidence and I don’t get why you are so upset about this.”

“Because if fucking Isaac told you that Derek kissed him, you wouldn’t doubt him for a second.”

“Are you seriously jealous?” Scott asked, sounding exasperated.

“I am not jealous, I am pissed that my best friend doesn’t believe me when I tell him something that sounds a bit weird. If Allison told you that she saw a unicorn, we would all be unicorn hunting by now.”

“Ok, fine, Derek kissed you because he is madly in love with you. Happy now?”

“I’m over the freaking moon! Excuse me, I really have to find Derek now.”

“Stiles!” Scott called out, “Come back!”

Stiles kept walking.

*

“Finally, I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”

“What are you doing at my apartment, Stiles? Shouldn’t you be at your prom?” Derek asked.

“Pfft, no one actually cares about prom, except ironically.”

“You didn’t sound that ironic earlier,” Derek pointed out.

“Most people seem to have trouble grasping sarcasm or maybe we don’t know each other as well as we thought we did. Like for instance, you clearly find my lips a lot more interesting than I assumed,” Stiles said triumphantly.

“About that, I think I might have been hallucinating because of the blood loss.”

“Did Scott text you about this?” Stiles demanded to know.

“What does Scott have to do with this?”

“I don’t know, you both seem to think people need to hallucinate to kiss me. Stop bullshitting, did you wanted to kiss me or not?”

“I don’t know, okay. It’s confusing,” Derek said defensively.

Stiles was starting to get really tired of this. “I know you’re not the smartest cookie in the jar, but you do have to know if you want to kiss someone or not.”

“Apparently not, and I went to college by the way. Stop insulting my intelligence.”

“For how long? Two months? Not long enough to figure out the whole kissing thing apparently. Screw this, I don’t know why I’m bothering. You are not interested, of course you’re not. Out of my league, I know. Bye, Derek, maybe I’ll see you at one of the pack reunions.”

Stiles was prepared for yet another storm off, but Derek stopped him by grabbing his shoulder.

“Wait, I did want to kiss you, ok. It’s just embarrassing since you’re so…”

“Unattractive,” Stiles filled in.

“Young, you moron.”

“Oh so it is the age difference.” Stiles felt relieved it wasn’t his face. “The fact that I have a dick, and a pretty decent one at that, doesn’t bother you?”

“Not really no,” Derek shrugged.

Stiles couldn’t control the smile forming on his face. “This is awesome, let’s do this!”

“Do what exactly?” Derek asked suspiciously.

“Sex of course, it’s prom night.”

“I’m not sleeping with you because it’s prom night which you only like ‘ironically’.”

“You have a point,” Stiles admitted. “Wanna make out?”

“Do you even like me?”

“I don’t hate you.”

Derek raised his eyebrows. “Well jeez, after that declaration, let’s just do it now.”

“You can’t expect me to declare my undying love because of one kiss and a not so unpleasant evening together.”

“Exactly,” Derek said.

“My dad will be so disappointed,” Stiles sulked.

Derek threw him a skeptical look.

“Oh you have no idea how much he likes you.”

“Listen, Stiles, I do like you,” Derek spitted out the word ‘like’ as if it had personally offended him. “But if you’re going to Georgetown then there really isn’t much point to this.”

“Right, Georgetown. I’m not really going there,” Stiles confessed.

“What? You haven’t stopped talking about it all night,” Derek pointed out.

“I do love to talk. But I can’t go, I mean I could go, feel free to read my acceptance letter. But it’s only a partial scholarship, UCLA has offered me a full ride. And it’s where Scott and Allison are going.”

“Then why haven’t you told anyone about this, not even Scott?”

“Because Anna is going to Princeton and so is Lydia and I don’t know, it sounded impressive. And however much I love Scott and Allison, it sucks being the third wheel. I was planning on telling everyone after graduation. I guess I thought a couple of weeks in fantasy world couldn’t hurt before I went back to the cruel, real one.”

“Yeah, I get it,” Derek said. Stiles believed he really did.

“But that does make things between us awkward. Does this mean we’re _dating_?” Stiles wondered.

It seemed inconceivable, Stiles and Derek _dating._

“We could start with going to a movie or something,” Derek suggested. “If we survive that, we can work from there.”

“I pick the movie,” Stiles decided.

“I can live with that.”

“Making out is obligated.”

“I can live with those terms,” Derek said, there was a small smile on his face.

“Fantastic. So I guess that means that not only did I kill a vampire tonight, I also got myself a boyfriend. Told you prom was awesome.”


End file.
